Seating Charts
Of all the wedding-related stuff that's going on, the one that I'm the most worried about and has been the most time-consuming is the table seating. I keep revising it, thinking that people would prefer to sit with people they know rather than strangers, but then what's the point of having everyone together if they don't mingle with each other and start dating each other and then have babies? Yeah babies! In any case, it's been like one of those word puzzles where Tom is to the left of Jack but then Suzy needs to be in the middle of them and Jane and Suzy will fight if together but not if Bob is around.
Rules that I should have come up with a spreadsheet for and made C script:
Certain exes can't sit next to each other. I mean heck, certain family members can't sit next to each other.
Family and friends should mostly be kept separate.
As even of a male to female ratio as possible.
Everyone should each have someone that they know and feel comfortable with, but also someone they don't know that they may enjoy talking to.
Conversely, the people that have travelled the most probably want to sit with the people they know because they get to so rarely.
Parents sit with kids.
Singles sit with at least 2 people they know.
At least 1 outgoing person per table.
People that don't like kids can't sit next to them.
Commonalities sit together: entrepreneurs, climbers, athletes, geographic locales, etc.
But then I get side-tracked trying to figure out whether people would rather get to know other people in their same geo or ones that kayak, and it all gets overwhelming again.
So, the new optimization rule is this: you all get at least one person you know, and up to 7 you don't. I hope you still end up having fun! (If you don't, don't tell me because I'll feel personally responsible and then miserable.)
Seating sucks
If it weren't for the fact it would be chaos... I would have open seating... but it just means people are separated and then get all annoyed.
Either way, we think we have finalized our seating arrangement and feel we have a good arrangement. In general, I try to keep groups together than know each other because I figure as soon as dinner is over, people will walk over to other tables and talk regardless. As well, we have cocktail hour beforehand. Either way, I'd rather have people comfortable (as much as possible) than sitting with people they don't know. There are a couple outliers that I have had a tough time with, but I think I figured out a fair seating arrangement.
We were originally not going to sit a separate sweetheart table... but after we found it painful to figure out who should be sitting at our table... so we just said screw it... and decided to make a sweetheart table. We won't be sitting there most of the time anyway as we go around greeting each table.
Solution to your stresses
Have the amount of alcohol served per table be proportional to the number of strangers at the table. Tables with lots of friends won't need much alcohol; tables with lots of strangers may need more alcohol to grease the wheels.