Weddings are Expensive.

Alternate title: Weddings - The Most Inefficient Transfer of Wealth From One Generation to the Next.

I wonder if my teenage rebellion against authority has morphed into a rebellion against tradition, or generalized into a rebellion against all industry. I didn't want a diamond because I don't want to support a controlled market that I see as an inefficient waste of lives and resources. I hate diamond commercials and ads, thus my view that anything bought from the Shane Company should get flushed down the toilet. And I tried to avoid supporting the ridiculous market that is the wedding industry. But maybe I'm just cheap.

Part of me still thinks about skipping the whole wedding thing and eloping. I mean, conflicting emotions and expectations abound, I get anxious planning a dinner party for 8, and add to that 30k of cost to my parents? No wonder this stuff drives people crazy. And did I mention the constant focus on what the bride wants? There's nothing like having 5 different vendors ask you what your color palette is to make you suddenly decide that you Need a color palette. Beyond that point is a slippery slope to a nervous breakdown about ribbon and throwing someone headfirst into a foam cake display. But everyone keeps deferring to me with lines about "this is YOUR day" and "whatever you envision, we'll make happen". Um...don't people know that absolute power corrupts absolutely? I'd like things to be pretty and not cost too much. I probably should hire a wedding planner who could make that happen, but that, to me, seems like an overwhelming task and plus, it costs more money. And, full disclosure, there is a part of me that is enjoying exercising control, and a part that sees this as a Challenge. And so far, it's been something new and different to do, and fun at times. Especially cake tasting.

Here's the low-down: my dad has planned more for this day than I have. I want a big party with all of my friends and family, and I want there to be lots of dancing. The specifics seemed unnecessary at first. But how do you make a decision on any of this stuff while trying to remember that the details are unimportant? And what's the line to walk when you're lucky enough to have a father that wants more than anything to make you happy and yet has very strong opinions and expectations on how things should go, especially when you've spent most of your life just being contrary to him? Let's have a Baptist minister officiate! (Yeah, that one was a fun conversation. I might as well bring up how Bill O'Reilly is a bastard son of satan while we're at it. God, if you're there, I swear I'll try to believe in you if Bill O'Reilly gets caught fornicating with a goat. See the issue with the Baptist minister yet?)

Also, I'm sorry if I'm not inviting you. I'm sure there are going to be some awkward conversations in our future, and it's probably more a logistics decision than a personal one, but boy feeling obligated to invite people sucks balls, as does not being able invite others to for headcount reasons.

So, in summary, my life is not very tough. I'm super lucky that I get to throw a big party for the people I love, and I really don't want to elope. It will be completely awesome to see everyone, like a reunion, and I can't wait to see all my friends together again. But I have been thinking about this stuff a lot, and wow it feels good to get this crap off my chest. Me, C, our siblings and parents, on a beach somewhere warm, with a respectable old dude telling us how to love...sometimes that sounds really damn good.